Fear

[Juan Botero]

In sanshou practice, I have absolute trust that other students will not intentionally harm me, yet the automatic (non-rational, basic) instinct of fear reactions always trigger in regardless. Like an automatic pilot that takes control of the plane when the altitude indicator gets below certain level.

Does anyone of you have any practical suggestions on how to stop the automatic pilot, i.e., to overcome the basic fear instinct?

[Scott M. Rodell]

... overcome the basic fear instinct?

In order to get past fear, you have to first understand what it is. Fear is simply thinking about what might happen to you. In other words, fear is not staying quiet & alert in the present, but is projecting into a non-existent future. By letting go of thought & instead being calmly alert, sticking & following, fear does not exist.

Sanshou or free swordplay can be to demanding an arena to begin learning to let go. But fortunately one can learn to let go in stages, beginnnig with letting go of physical tension in exercises like zhanzhuang & then in form practice. Then move on to letting go of desire to win, to look good, etc, in tuishou, & so on. So you can not overcome fear, but you can learn not to create it.

In my experince, & the experience of many of your senior classmates, the most valuable reason for practicing the more dangerous aspects of our art is see what fear is & learning to let go of it. I'd say this is one way that our martial art is useful to us everyday because when we have learned to let go of fear we can deal with things calmly.

[Juan Botero]

Thank you very much.
Juan

[Roland Tepp]

Then move on to letting go of desire to win, to look good, etc, in tuishou, & so on. So you can not overcome fear, but you can learn not to create it.

Imho - very useful trick in many situations, not only tuishou, but also sanshou as well as any real-life situations. Once you let go of the desire to win, to look good and in fact any competitive thoughts, you will automatically gain some level of detachment from the whole situation and lessen the fear of failing at these desires.

It is my understanding from my own experience as well as from watching people I practice with, that very often the main cause of fear is desire of not getting hurt (and in the class very often also the fear of hurting your duifang). In fact many people seem to perceive the MA practice as means of instantly achieving the art of not getting hurt in a fight.

While this is partially true - once achieved, the chance of escaping the conflict with minimal bruising increases somewhat, the learning process can and most likely will be somewhat painful. One has to accept that as a natural part of the learning process. We are in most part not born invincible and becoming one is a path of many bruises...

Once you lose the desire (or hope) to go through the sanshou class without ever being hit and accept that, you have already shed a great part of the fear.

And as always - it's not about who lands most punches or kicks or who is more powerful or fastest or what not - It's all about who learns the most from the exercise. And in order to learn, you must accept that you are not perfect...

[CERogers]

My biggest fear is humiliation. That's why I try to stay in the back of the class and hope not to be called on. There's always that "I'm going to screw up" in the back of my head. Shanshou isn't so bad, just as long as you wear a mouthpiece Juan, but it's nasty. As long as you keep your teeth in your head, you'll be alright Truth is, I am more afraid of the being called out on than any sparring match.

Best,

Courtney

[TCosta]

We're always our own worst critics. From my viewpoint, you're doing just fine, Courtney. We're all beginners, right now.. even after 2 years (approx.). I had horrible form, at the beginning of last night, but I balanced out, after about 1/2 hour.. It happens.

-Trevor

[Scott M. Rodell]

If I might offer a quote from my favorite Yang Family transmission,
The Method of Achieving Perfect Clarity...

Bravery is not correct
Timidity is not correct
Strong courage and Keen perception are correct"

see page 116, Tai Chi Touchstones: Yang Family Secret Transmissions, trans. Douglas Wile.

[Juan Botero]

Roland and Courtney, thank you for your comments. You are right. It is not that other students will not harm you, but rather that they will not intentionally harm you beyond what is necessary for your training. And I greatly appreciate Roland's thought on accepting it from the outset.

They do in fact harm you, but that's ok.

[josh stout]

I think part of doing martial arts is learning how to deal with fear in small doses, so that we don't drown in it in a real situation. I find that focusing on the connection between fear and breathing helps. Fear is natural and a little adrenalin can be helpful, but when you stop breathing in a regular deep fashion into the abdomen, then it is time to get both the breathing and fear under control. Once the breathing is under control, the fear should be easier live with.
Josh

[CERogers]

Some schools of thought take fear as a unnecessary emotion, but I know that's not true. It's very necessary in real life situations, but not so much if you create something in your head to be afraid of. Humiliation is very real, but I can't just assume that I will without a doubt be humilited, unless of course I am doing push hands with Laoshr or Ben. I just need to chill, clear my mind and relax while maintaining my mind intent/awareness. Oh and practice would help too Thanks Laoshr for the reference and thanks everybody for your support!

[TCosta]

It is funny how the mind can affect the body, but it is at least as interesting to know that the reverse is true - the body can affect the mind. So, if you can focus on controlling your body (breathing, as mentioned, is the best example), the mind follows. It doesn't work in ALL situations, but it helps a lot. I think this is what Josh is alluding to, and it's a good thing to know.

-Trevor

[josh stout]

Yes that is a nice and direct way of saying what I was trying to convey. Breathing is effected by full strength emotions, for example laughter and sobbing. As you say, it can go the other way too. By controlling the breathing the emotion is controlled. This is not to say one should stop an emotion any more than one should stop breathing. It is just that one controls the other, and it is easier to consciously control the breathing than it is the emotion.

Josh

[CERogers]

Nah, doesn't work. I am breathing right now btw. I breathe a lot, in fact every second or so. But, I get what you are saying
I don't think there is anyone I know that is harder on me but myself and if I have negative feelings, everything else, including bad environment, bad luck, etc. is attracted to me.
Don't know if anyone here has read "The Secret" but that's what they say about having a negative mind frame. Must focus on positive thoughts, positive thoughts!

[Psi Man]

Buddhism mentions three kinds of arrogance: 1) Thinking one is better than others 2) thinking one is worse than others and 3) thinking one is equal to others.

I'd say thoughts give rise to emotions. Focusing on breathing helps us to become less attached to our thoughts.

[Baba Deep]

Just chill out. Don't focus on the fear. Everything is the result of choices you make. Ask yourself why you are choosing to react with fear.